{"id":2117,"date":"2014-12-18T00:37:33","date_gmt":"2014-12-18T05:37:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/terrencemetz.com\/?p=2117"},"modified":"2026-04-21T13:48:40","modified_gmt":"2026-04-21T17:48:40","slug":"meeting-conflict-response","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-conflict-response\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Potent Ways to Facilitate Meeting Conflict Response and Manage Conflict"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2 class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s2\">F<\/span><span class=\"s1\">acilitators must understand and manage <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-conflicts\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">meeting conflicts<\/a>. Therefore, we must first understand our own internal conflict so that we are prepared to serve others. Critically, we should view our meeting conflict response as both a challenge and an opportunity.<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Meetings are expensive and mitigating conflict provides one of the absolute best reasons for meetings. However, conflict also comes from the situation, and from you.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 class=\"p1\"><span class=\"s1\"><b>Don\u2019t Run from Internal Conflict <\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n<div id=\"attachment_12034\" style=\"width: 856px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a class=\"dt-pswp-item\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Fig-30-SituationalFactors.png\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-dt-img-description=\"Situational Factors\" data-large_image_width=\"846\" data-large_image_height=\"672\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-12034\" class=\"wp-image-12034 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Fig-30-SituationalFactors-300x238.png\" alt=\"Situational Factors\" width=\"300\" height=\"238\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Fig-30-SituationalFactors-300x238.png 300w, https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Fig-30-SituationalFactors-768x610.png 768w, https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Fig-30-SituationalFactors.png 846w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-12034\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Conflict Response to Situational Factors<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Internal conflict is fear, and all people have <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/fud-factor\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">fears<\/a>. However, when we allow these fears to control us, we lose our ability to perform. Therefore, the first step is to understand our fears. Once we do, we can control them and begin to manage conflict. Because fears never go away\u2014you simply learn\u00a0to acknowledge or contain them. <i>Learn to control fears.<\/i> Below are some typical <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/unconsciously-competent\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">facilitator<\/a> fears:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul class=\"ul1\">\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Being too &#8220;mechanical&#8221;<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/make-thinking-visible\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Challenges<\/a> and attacks<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">How much responsibility to take<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Inability to <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/persuasion\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">persuade<\/a>, motivate<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Looking like a beginner<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Losing <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/concern-influence-and-control\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">control<\/a> \u2014 asserting control<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Making <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/mistakes-organizations-make\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">mistakes<\/a> or failing<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/problem-meetings\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span class=\"s1\">People with problems<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/why-facilitation-is-one-of-the-most-important-skills-for-the-future\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span class=\"s1\">Public speaking<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/change-or-die\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">unknown<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Wanting to be liked, approved of<\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li5\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Wanting to give advice or <a href=\" https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/how-to-ensure-neutral-facilitation\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">ideas<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li class=\"li6\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">What to do about <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/power-of-silence\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">silence<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 class=\"p1\"><span class=\"s1\"><b>Fly In Formation<\/b><\/span><\/h3>\n<p class=\"p2\"><span class=\"s1\" style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Once you identify your personal fears, you can find ways to make them work to your advantage. Remember that the butterflies in your stomach will always be there. Therefore, you don\u2019t want to remove them. However, you want to teach them to fly in formation. <\/span><\/p>\n<h3><strong>External Conflict<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Conflict in your group is natural and not necessarily bad when responsibly managed. Hence, you must channel conflict into productivity. Managed well, conflict leads to expanded <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/facilitative-leadership\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">information exchange<\/a>, surfaced <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-conflicts\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">rationales<\/a>, more <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/decision-quality\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">options<\/a>, and better group <a title=\"Establishing Common Purpose Provides the Secret to Building Consensus\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/common-purpose\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">decisions<\/a> that enable <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/managing-change\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">change<\/a>. Managed poorly, conflict destroys. Effectively managed, conflict leads to positive transformation. However, if left festering in the hallways, conflict leads to chaos.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Conflict provides one of the best reasons for justifying the time and expense of a face-to-face meeting because it cannot be properly resolved with mail, attachments, and messaging. Because society places negative values on conflict at home and at school, we are not taught collaborative problem-solving skills. Therefore, let&#8217;s consider the external sources of conflict, barriers you will encounter, and responses that are proven effective.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Facilitative leaders can channel conflict into productivity. For example, look at the U.S. Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service.<a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/4BA5A88F-3AED-4737-8CC8-3B0990117BF4#_ftn1\" name=\"_ftnref1\">[1]<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">\u201cA peaceful, harmonious place can be the worst thing possible for a business. Research shows that the biggest predictor of poor company performance is complacency. Therefore, conflict can shake things up and boost your staff&#8217;s energy and creativity.\u201d<a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/4BA5A88F-3AED-4737-8CC8-3B0990117BF4#_ftn2\" name=\"_ftnref2\"><sup><strong>[2]<\/strong><\/sup><\/a><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/4BA5A88F-3AED-4737-8CC8-3B0990117BF4#_ftnref1\" name=\"_ftn1\"><\/a><\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_2118\" style=\"width: 510px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img wpfc-lazyload-disable=\"true\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-2118\" class=\"wp-image-2118 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/10\/external-conflict-e1558210603668.png\" alt=\"6 Potent Ways to Facilitate Conflict Response and Manage Conflict\" width=\"500\" height=\"351\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-2118\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Conflict Response<\/span><\/strong><\/p><\/div>\n<h3><strong>Recognizing the Need for Meeting Conflict Response<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Recognize that conflict exists particularly when you sense <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-problems\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">resistance<\/a> from the group. Therefore, if your intuition tells you that something is not right, you would be wise to listen to the symptoms:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Challenges and attacks<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Silence and <a title=\"What Takes the Energy from Meetings with Good People and Intent?\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-challenges\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">withdrawal<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Emergence of <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/conflict-response\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">people with problems<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Tardiness and <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-killers\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">punctuality<\/a> problems<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Sabotage attempts at the project, process, or facilitator<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><strong>Sources of Conflict<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Primary sources of conflict in a typical workshop include the following. However, keep in mind that the two leading indicators are <em>tenure<\/em> (i.e., how long somebody has been around) and when their jobs, titles, or reporting situation is <em>at risk<\/em> of being changed:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Competition\u2014feeling out of control or the need to control<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Fears\u2014participant <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/facilitation-skills\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">fears<\/a> as well as facilitator fears<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Habits\u2014accustomed to disagreeing or arguing, cultural<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Listening <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/guard-against-bias\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">filters<\/a>\u2014age, background<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/evidence-based\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Misinformation<\/a>\u2014rumors, especially about change<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Participants\u2019 problems\u2014out of control, unable to excel or bond<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a title=\"17 Valuable Tips and Essential Issues for \u201cChairing\u201d Successful Meetings\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/chairing-meetings\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Poorly defined objectives<\/a>\u2014misunderstanding of expectations<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Priorities\u2014similar values, but varying priorities<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/conflict-response\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Semantics<\/a>\u2014understanding of words and intent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/facilitate-multiple-generations\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Situations<\/a>\u2014business process improvement, restructuring, reorganizations, automating<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/make-thinking-visible\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Thinking styles<\/a>\u2014vertical\/ horizontal<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Ways participants view others\u2014<a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/selective-perception\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">biases<\/a>, heuristics, prejudices<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><strong>Barriers to Meeting Conflict Response<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The following barriers inhibit your ability to manage conflict:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Ability or willingness to <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/executive-presence\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">listen<\/a>\u2014yours and theirs<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Copper or fiber (online meetings)\u2014inability to challenge participants in person<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/fud-factor\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Fears<\/a>\u2014yours and theirs<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Group norms\u2014<a title=\"Establishing Common Purpose Provides the Secret to Building Consensus\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/decision-quality\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">culture<\/a> such as \u201cwe don\u2019t discuss that here\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Image\u2014inability to save face<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Lack of <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/executive-presence\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">skill<\/a>\u2014a weak or poorly trained facilitator<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Learned responses\u2014Our past is hard to unlearn<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Time\u2014<a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/consensus-does-not-mean-that-participants-are-going-to-be-happy\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">consensus<\/a> is seldom achieved quickly<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Vulnerability\u2014real or perceived threats<\/span><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span> \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Paradigm Challenges<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Paradigms are established accepted norms, patterns of behavior, or shared sets of assumptions. They are models that establish boundaries or rules for success. Therefore, paradigms present structural barriers to creativity based on psychological, cultural, and environmental factors. Examples include:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Flow charts, diagrams, and other conventions that people get comfortable with when presenting information that they rely on habitually (e.g., swim lanes).<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Stereotypes about men and women and their roles in business, family, and society<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Where people sit in meetings, when in person\u2014once they find a seat it becomes \u201ctheir seat\u201d for the rest of the meeting, or meetings if the seat associates with their own desired level of position or power (could be high or low, and a seat up front or far back)<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>Groupthink<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">As creatures of habit, we blindly subscribe to our cultural paradigms, unknowingly allowing our <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-bias\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">biases and prejudices<\/a> to affect our decision-making, and readily falling prey to <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/challenge-groupthink\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">groupthink<\/a>. There is power in large numbers, but not necessarily an increase in quality. For example, <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/voting-sucks\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">voting<\/a> reflects a method of groupthink decision-making. However, the winner is not necessarily a better decision, it only reflects a bigger number.<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>Challenge Both<\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">When people raise objectives, discover the cause of the objection. By challenging participants, you convert their subject matter bias into its objective nature. What causes the objection and <strong>what is the measurement of the cause<\/strong>? The chili is too spicy (subjective) and may be converted into 1,400 Scoville units (objective).<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Ask about &#8216;Paradigm Shift&#8217;\u2014\u201cWhat is impossible today, but if made possible . . . What would you do differently?\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Consider using Edward de Bono\u2019s <em>Thinking Hats<\/em> (pg 216) where you impose perspectives such as the different tactics that might be taken by a monastery contrasted with an organized crime syndicate.<a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/47334E02-4FC4-46E5-BF70-529B5AB4FA4E#_ftn1\" name=\"_ftnref1\">[3]<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Force the group to look at a familiar idea or scenario in a new way by changing their <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/how-to-develop-questions\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">perspective<\/a>. Shifting perspectives frequently helps &#8216;shake&#8217; paradigms.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Have a few tools in your hip pocket, usually visual or riddle-based. Build a tool kit for immediate help and prepare a hip pocket set of <em>Tools<\/em> and procedures for the unexpected.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><a name=\"_Toc58849758\"><\/a>Anger and Some Other Stuff<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">How well do you personally respond to conflict? To effectively facilitate conflict, you must keep the situation constructive and . . .<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Build a tool kit for immediate help and prepare a hip pocket set of <em>Tools<\/em> and procedures for the unexpected.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Know how to communicate acceptance by promoting integral thinking, a &#8216;Yes AND attitude&#8217; not &#8216;Yes BUT . . .&#8217;<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Anger\u2014One letter short of Danger<\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Realize that anger is as normal as any other emotion. We expect or want things to be different or better. Most people direct their <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/dealing-with-anger\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">anger<\/a> at those who have some control over them. However, anger can be healthy and is different from hostility, which is not healthy. Anger is often used to hide other feelings such as hurt or disappointment. Therefore, learn how to deal with anger in others and in yourself. Remain cautious, however, because the term \u2018anger\u2019 is only one letter \u2018d\u2019 short of the term \u2018danger.\u2019<\/span><\/p>\n<h4>When dealing with <em>others\u2019<\/em> anger:<\/h4>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Acknowledge and affirm the participant\u2019s beliefs.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Encourage the participant to talk about the reasons for their anger. This helps diffuse the anger.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Let the participant vent before trying to explain or apologize.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Use nonjudgmental active listening. This lets the participant know that you care.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4>When dealing with <em>your own<\/em> anger:<\/h4>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Acknowledge and accept the anger. Do not deny it or it will resurface at the wrong time.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Deal with the problem that caused the anger as quickly as practical. However, do not make decisions when your anger is in control.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Take a break, whether in person or online. Take a walk and reprogram yourself.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><em><strong>When you listen to participants, they become more prepared to <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/better-listeners\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">listen<\/a> to each other. Anger often dissipates and trust begins to emerge. Make sure that both you and the participants avoid communicating rejection. Rejection incites defensiveness and blocks listening.<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><strong>Six Actions for Your Meeting Conflict Response<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">How do you respond to managing conflict? To effectively facilitate a conflict situation, you must keep conflict constructive and . . .<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Understand <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/dealing-with-anger\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">anger<\/a>\u2014dealing with yours and theirs.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Know how to communicate acceptance\u2014to promote open <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/rhetorical-precision\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">communications<\/a>.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Understand <a title=\"Consensus does NOT Mean that Participants are Going to be \u201cHappy\u201d\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/consensus-does-not-mean-that-participants-are-going-to-be-happy\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">consensus<\/a>\u2014it is not compromised.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/meeting-preparation\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Prepare<\/a> properly\u2014know if it is coming.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Build a tool kit (see <em>MGR<span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\">USH<\/span><\/em> Facilitative Leadership\u00a0<a title=\"Guidelines for Selecting Appropriate Structured Facilitation Tools\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/facilitation-tools\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><em>Tools<\/em><\/a> for immediate help and develop a hip pocket set of tools in preparation for the unexpected)\u2014build teams and diffuse problems.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a title=\"Challenge the Status Quo, such as \u201cWe don\u2019t do things that way around here.\u201d\" href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/challenge-the-status-quo\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Challenge<\/a>\u2014When people raise objectives, discover the cause of the objection. With <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/active-listening\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">active listening<\/a> and proper leadership, the objection can be converted into a criterion. What causes the objection and what is the <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/smart-measures\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">unit of measurement<\/a> of the cause?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: center;\" align=\"center\"><strong>______<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\"><a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/4BA5A88F-3AED-4737-8CC8-3B0990117BF4#_ftnref1\" name=\"_ftn1\">[1]<\/a> The penalty for a Federal Mediator who violates neutrality is prison.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\"><a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/4BA5A88F-3AED-4737-8CC8-3B0990117BF4#_ftnref2\" name=\"_ftn2\"><sup>[2]<\/sup><\/a> Saj-Nicole, Joni and Damon, Beyer \u201cHow to Pick a Good Fight,\u201d Harvard Business Review, December 2009, pg 50.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\"><a href=\"applewebdata:\/\/47334E02-4FC4-46E5-BF70-529B5AB4FA4E#_ftnref1\" name=\"_ftn1\">[3]<\/a> De Bono, Edward \u201c<em>Six Thinking Hats<\/em>,\u201d https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Six-Thinking-Hats-Edward-Bono\/dp\/0316178314\/<\/span><\/p>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000; font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>______<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Don\u2019t ruin your career by hosting <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/bad-meetings\/\">bad meetings<\/a>. Sign up for a <a href=\"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/public-facilitation-training\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">workshop<\/a> or send this to someone who should. <em><a href=\"https:\/\/web.archive.org\/web\/20260106090117\/https:\/\/mgrush.com\/\">MGR<span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\">USH<\/span><\/a><\/em> workshops focus on meeting design and practice. Each person practices tools, methods, and activities every day during the week. Therefore, while some call this immersion, we call it the road to building high-value facilitation skills.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Facilitators must understand and manage meeting conflicts. Therefore, we must first understand our own internal conflict so that we are prepared to serve others. Critically, we should view our meeting conflict response as both a challenge and an opportunity. Meetings are expensive and mitigating conflict provides one of the absolute best reasons for meetings. However, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2118,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[453185951,453185953,55884429],"tags":[453192248,138617,453192585,453190834,453190891,453190889,270263,453190890,453190705,453192230],"class_list":["post-2117","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-leadership-skills","category-managing-conflict","category-meeting-support","tag-4-activities","tag-active-listening","tag-anger","tag-build-consensus","tag-conflict-response","tag-facilitate-conflict-response","tag-groupthink","tag-manage-conflict","tag-neutrality","tag-paradigm"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.7 (Yoast SEO v27.7) - 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However, he also observed meetings that worked. What set them apart? A well-prepared leader who structured the session to ensure participants contributed meaningfully and achieved clear outcomes. Throughout his career, Metz, who earned an MBA from Kellogg (Northwestern University) experienced and also trained in various facilitation techniques. In 2004, he purchased MG RUSH where he shifted his focus toward improving established meeting designs and building a curriculum that would teach others how to lead, facilitate, and structure meetings that drive results. His expertise in training world-class facilitators led to the 2020 publication of Meetings That Get Results: A Guide to Building Better Meetings, a comprehensive resource on effectively building consensus. Grounded in the principle that \u201cnobody is smarter than everybody,\u201d the book details the why, what, and how of building consensus when making decisions, planning, and solving problems. Along with a Participant\u2019s Guide and supplemental workshops, it supports learning from foundational awareness to professional certification. Metz\u2019s first book, Change or Die: A Business Process Improvement Manual, tackled the challenges of process optimization. His upcoming book, Catalyst: Facilitating Innovation, focuses on meetings and workshops that don\u2019t simply end when time runs out but conclude with actionable next steps and clear assignments\u2014ensuring progress beyond discussions and ideas.","sameAs":["http:\/\/MGrush.com","http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/FacilitationTraining\/","https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/terrencemetz\/","@teammetz","https:\/\/x.com\/TerrenceMetz","https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=j4x3-Qo9Ez4"],"birthDate":"1955-09-23","gender":"male","jobTitle":"Managing Director","worksFor":"MG Rush Facilitation","url":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/author\/teammetz7\/"}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/10\/external-conflict-e1558210603668.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2117","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2117"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2117\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2118"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2117"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2117"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2117"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}