{"id":11816,"date":"2020-10-08T07:00:30","date_gmt":"2020-10-08T11:00:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/?p=11816"},"modified":"2025-11-08T16:41:04","modified_gmt":"2025-11-08T21:41:04","slug":"collaborate","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mgrush.com\/blog\/collaborate\/","title":{"rendered":"Collaborate Or Die – How Failing To Collaborate Could Ruin More Than Just Your Next Meeting"},"content":{"rendered":"

In life, there is usually more than one right answer, but there is always a wrong attitude\u2014the unwillingness or failure to collaborate<\/em>.<\/strong><\/span><\/h2>\n

As of this writing, the 2020 elections will be here in less than four weeks. While, like most Americans, you’re probably focused on November 3rd<\/sup>, you should be more concerned about November 4th<\/sup><\/u> \u2014and beyond. If ‘the powers that be’ cannot collaborate<\/strong> in the coming weeks and months, expect some very rough times.<\/span><\/p>\n

The ability to collaborate<\/strong> is critical to homo sapiens\u2019 survival (see Harari<\/a>). And, if we didn\u2019t need to collaborate, we wouldn\u2019t need facilitation. We could survive by obeying someone else\u2019s commands. But that doesn\u2019t work, not in the long run.<\/span><\/p>\n

Rather than artificial intelligence (AI) or global warming, the stubbornness to appreciate and value our differences, the unwillingness to explore reasons behind our disagreements, and the obstinance to remain inflexible may be our ultimate undoing. Because if we lose our spirit to collaborate, we\u2019ll be dead long before the oceans rise as high as predicted by scientists.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Collaborate<\/a>Unstructured discussions are not working<\/strong>[1]<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

The world needs structured facilitation more than ever to develop solutions that are owned and shared by ALL stakeholders. A friend of mine in the facilitation profession claims that one of the following three reasons describes all disagreements,[2]<\/strong>\u00a0<\/strong>either:<\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. People are in violent agreement with each other. Unfortunately, they define key terms differently\u2014or, they use different terms to define the same thing\u2014and don\u2019t know it, or<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. People have different values and can\u2019t agree. For example, an organization that stresses \u201csafety and the principle of no harm\u201d may take a slightly less profitable road in the short run in order to save lives and improve health in the long run. Another organization may not choose safety, preferring the quick win NOW, not later, or<\/span><\/li>\n
  3. Some people refuse to collaborate because of age-long animosity that began before they were even born. Goofy. Who cares about the past when our present is being jeopardized and we are facing an impending future with unmanageable hazards, menaces, and risks?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Collaborate and Avoid <\/strong>DoA<\/strong> (Display of Attitude)<\/strong><\/h3>\n

    I heard recently from Dr. Alphonsus Obayuwana,\u00a0an expert on \u2018happiness\u2019<\/a>, that at the very least we all share one thing in common\u2014we were all born \u2018unhappy\u2019. Thousands of babies were delivered, and this obstetrician never once saw a baby exit the womb smiling. We all begin with a frown, usually accentuated with a cry.<\/span><\/p>\n

    We continue to cry as adults when we don\u2019t get our way. Each of us, at times, is guilty of our own DoA (Display of Attitude) characterized by one of the following characteristics:<\/span><\/p>\n